FALLING IN LOVE

I remember the party where everything changed. It was in Venice, California. I was sitting on a cream leather sofa, sipping a white wine spritzer, looking at all the guests working very hard trying to enjoy themselves. And I had a moment – a vision, sort of. I imagined Dr. Ruth suddenly popping in and in her inimitable way saying, “Alright everybody, you’re here because you want to find true love, right?” And I heard everybody answer, “Right!” So I decided to host a party where finding true love could actually happen. For real. And how, I asked myself, was I going to accomplish that?

I’ve always marveled at how children easily play with one another. They run onto a playground and have fun. So how could I encourage adults to do the same? When you play, you forget who you think you are and discover who you really are. I’ve experienced this when I’m acting, directing and writing. This article, for instance. I don’t really know what I’m going to write until the words appear on the screen because I’m engaged in the creative process. In other words, I’m playing. 

SINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE
So I asked two good friends to host a singles party with me. We each invited a single platonic friend of the opposite sex, who in turn invited a single platonic friend of the opposite sex, and so on. The party ended up with an even number of men and women. The same formula works with LBGTQ+ singles. I set up icebreaker games, fun questions and affinity corners where guests could show up like kids at a playground and step into their playful selves.

We had so much fun! We met people we would never have met if not for my party – we played games, told stories, ate, danced, talked about favorite experiences and laughed about embarrassing ones.

Some of us became friends (romantic and platonic), and some of us threw more parties.

When we get together with others, the possibility of fun and play exists. Taking part in activities you like increases the body’s serotonin.Stress goes away. Your complexion improves, your eyes shine, your energy goes from negative to positive, and your libido gets stronger. You basically become more attractive. You become the YOU that you were meant to be. I promise, your smile won’t be fake. Cupid’s arrows will fly.

And what better time than Valentine’s to host a singles party? Encourage your guests to wear something red, have a playful secret ready to share, press on temporary heart tattoos or bring their favorite love song to dance to. And, yes, the world is topsy-turvy, but that’s all the more reason to enjoy life.

Just last week I was at a birthday party for a friend, and we laughed so much, the other diners wanted to join our table. And please, don’t feel guilty for having fun. If you can take a few minutes to walk in the park or connect with a friend or host a singles party, do it. The days go by too quickly. To quote one of my favorite screenwriters, Richard Curtis, “If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling love actually is all around.”

THE ACT OF PLAY IS TOO IMPORTANT
I recently overheard a young woman at lunch with her friends. She said, “My life is okay. I have a job, friends and family. But I hardly ever laugh.” We just don’t have enough fun as adults. When was the last time you truly enjoyed yourself? I’ve noticed that the “play” aspect in a person’s life seems to diminish in direct proportion to their age. As George Bernard Shaw famously said, “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

So, let’s have fun. Let’s play. Let’s throw a party. And let’s find our true loves!

Terri is the author of The Party: How to Have Fun While Finding True Love, Available at Amazon.com